Hi There! Bob here. I thought we were going on a sailing adventure. Instead, Kim and I are currently on a boat work adventure. It turns out we’re also on a voyage of self-discovery, sort of. It turns out, one can be married for 30 years and still have a lot to discover about one’s spouse! And one’s self.

For our entire dating and married lives, encompassing now nearly 34 years, Kim and I have had separate careers. I worked in practice as a pediatrician and she worked as a child life specialist. I’ve always thought Kim is amazing and have been certain she was excellent at her job, but now that we are working at the SAME job, it’s been rather eye-opening. For the last month, we have been together nearly 24/7. We eat, sleep, run errands, and most of all, do boat work together. And I love it. We have never been a couple with separate interests. Whether that is good or bad, I will let you debate. For my part, I have never been interested in “poker night” or a guy’s trip. Having a “man cave” never interested me. Kim’s my best friend. I like to spend time with her. So my interests are our interests. We like to travel, enjoy good food, cook, hike, and now sail (or so we hope). When we do stuff, we do it together. If we can’t do something together, I find I’m just not that interested. For example, I like to ski. Kim, not so much. So I choose not to ski. And it’s not a sacrifice at all. I’d rather spend time with her.

New anchor chain!
Unfinished bulkhead repair

And now, we are spending a LOT of time together. And I am learning how amazing she is in some new ways. Mostly, those ways entail trying to keep me out of trouble. I tend to be pretty aggressive in tackling projects. When I see something that needs to be done, I just charge in and do it. On Meraviglia, the list of projects is sooooo long, that it’s easy to get overwhelmed and not know where to start. Some of the projects are long and involved. Others are smaller and shorter-term. For instance, I’ve described rebuilding the rotten bulkhead. We finished the first stage of the repair a few weeks ago but there is still a ways to go. We can’t fiberglass it in and paint until after the chainplates are replaced, so it’s just sitting there, staring at us in it’s incomplete glory. I find that irritating. On the other hand, we replaced our anchor chain, which only took a few hours (the original chain was corroded beyond salvage, of course).

Rebuilt propane locker!

When tackling all these projects, it turns out Kim and I have different strengths and approaches. I tend to jump in and go until it’s either done or I can’t figure something out. Then I do some research. Kim tends to do the research first. I have no hesitation about disassembling stuff that needs repair. Kim is very hesitant to take stuff apart. Can you see where this is going? A definite downside of my approach is that stuff tends to break. Because of me. I mean, most of the stuff on Meraviglia is already broken, but I have added to the list. For instance, the hatch to the propane locker: As I was rebuilding the locker, I noticed that the lens on the hatch was separated from the frame. This means water could leak into the locker (another leak! Who could have guessed??!!). So I figured we should remove the lens and rebed it with new adhesive. Did I search YouTube for instructions on removing the lens first? OF COURSE NOT! It looked straightforward. Off the lens came. In two pieces of course, because I cracked it, but it came off. We’ll need to get a new lens. When I showed Kim, she promptly dug up a video on lens removal. Cool! Because there’s another hatch with the same problem.

Leaking Hatch Lens
Broken Hatch Lens

Kim: “No. Bob, we’ve got 200 projects going on and that hatch lens only leaks a little and can wait until we finish other stuff. Plus, why don’t you finish one lens replacement first, so you learn the technique before ripping out the other one?”

Me: “Because that one is leaking too and we should do them together.”

Kim: “When the propane locker leaks, where does the water go?”

Me: “Into the ocean.”

Kim: “When this other locker leaks, where does the water go?”

Me: “Into our boat.”

Kim: “And so, if you remove the entire lens and can’t get it back in, what’s going to happen?”

Me: “Never mind.”

And that, in a nutshell, is what I have learned. Kim is always right. It’s my new motto. I have given her explicit instructions: When I want to tackle something and she doesn’t think it’s a good idea, she is to say “Bob, remember: you told me to tell you I’m right.”

It’s been almost a week since I broke something.

And that is how the team works. I start the projects and Kim sees new and different and better ways of solving problems we find along the way. I’m not saying that together we can do ANYTHING, but together, we can do a whole lot more that we can apart. And there’s less swearing.